This is a satirical look at the Isle of Wight. It is a good natured poke at island life. It is a slice of the stories from The Spoof, a satirical on-line newspaper. There are various contributors.

Monday, 28 February 2011

No casualties after Snow Plough Rampage

The plough can reach speeds of 30mph!
The snow plough that was being taken from Newport to Ryde over the weekend fortunately saw no casualties during its eight hour rampage down the A3054.

Witnesses doing a spot of late night shopping at Tesco say that they saw the fifteen ton bright yellow machine careering down past Whippingham and hurtling across Wootton Bridge heading toward Binstead.

"I was feared for my life," said Mavis Davies, 62 and resident of Wootton Bridge for seventy-five years. "I barely got across the road in time on me Zimmer frame as it bore down on me."


Sunday, 27 February 2011

Inaction Plan to be Implemented Soon

Pugh Demonstrates how the new plan will be actioned
David Pugh has announce a new initiative that he hopes will help put Islanders to work while helping to eliminate government waste of taxpayer's dollars through needless government programs. Dubbed the "Inaction Plan", Pugh's initiative has been a long time coming according to Newport resident Ron Southward.

"There is no question that government can do things better and at less cost, it's the human side of things that has to be considered."


Wednesday, 23 February 2011

Arson suspected in chippy fire

Fire fighters were still there in the morning
Hopeless Street chip-shop in Ventnor is the centre of a police investigation after a fire broke out there at 10:30pm Monday morning.

Regular Isle of Wight News readers, and even some of those with constipation, will recall our recent survey to find the island's be'st chippie's. Hopeless Street chippy was in the final three. Police suspect that the owners of either Ventnor Tandoori and Traditional English Chips And Curry or The Plaice in Newport may be responsible in an effort to reduce the competition, and will be keeping a close eye on both establishments.

Thursday, 3 February 2011

Chain Ferry out of action; Again!

The ferry on the one day last year it worked
The chain link car ferry that connects Cowes to East Cowes is out of action, yet again.

Severe weather on the island over the past few weeks has resulted in localised flooding around the chain link ferry connection points. This follows on from the ferry being out of action during a large portion of the summer due to chain expansion in the heat.

"This is getting seriously silly," said local resident Humphrey Dumphrey, 47. "I am a regular user of the ferry to get from my house in East Cowes to my job as a milkman in Cowes."